I’m a pretty simple gyrl. I like happiness in my life, and I enjoy people. All kinds of people. I am something different to many people, but my many “personalities” do not mean I am trying to hide myself. Rather, I am a person who enjoys many things and I adapt well to the things that people need from me.
What I want from life is to enjoy my life, live it well, live it in a peaceful manner, and to bring happiness to those around me in the things I do and say.
Something that has been brought up to me recently is that in many of my online hotspots, my relationship status is listed as “taken.” This has, I believe, recently changed, although that has nothing to do with my flirty manner. I am always flirty, moreso when I have people that cavort with me. Whether or not i am in a relationship has nothing to do with the way I respond to people and converse online. It has little to do with the way i conduct myself in a person-to-person situation, either, since I do not go hopping from one person’s bedroom to another.
I hug a lot in person. I link arms with people. I hold hands with my friends when we’re talking or walking. It is something i have always done, and it is a way to connect with the people i care about. It doesn’t stop because I’ve given my heart to a person to hold.
Recently, my S.O. has been … missing. We go through this every other year or so, for a few months. This time, though, I believe I have lost my patience, and I do think that if he decides to start calling/texting/emailing/IMing again, I will not be receptive in the “everything is ok” way. I think this time I will pick up where we left off, but keep it on a friends-only basis. The fact that he lives 2600 miles from me makes a serious relationship difficult enough. But he’s afraid of the commitment I require before picking up and moving, and I refuse to change my demands in that respect. I’m not asking for a marriage proposal. Just an I-love-you without restraint. An open heart, and a promise to try hard to work things out. I deserve that much, and have not yet gotten it. I love him, but I cannot sacrifice my security and safety of being near people that love me to move to a state so far away without knowing that I will be loved in return once I get there.
This is all a very pared-down version of our story. It is long, complicated, and difficult to express. Suffice to say that I love him, want to be with him … am pretty sure he loves me and wants to be with me … but I know his fear of being crushed a second time in his life is hindering his ability to open up to me in the ways that I need.
Thanks for listening. I will try to correct the “taken” statuses to lessen the confusion of the people around me.
Peace.Love.Happiness.
DevylGyrl
Random Thoughts and Musings 
Who’s he?? hmmmm…. Good for you. I think relationship should be give and take. Not that you always give and he take and him not giving. I’m not really in the position to tell you things for I am younger than you but hey! there are a lot of us who love you… truly love you and either online or offline..
*hugs you gurl*